Plan to get Active

This past few weeks have been weeks where I'm trying to figure out, what to do and where to go. Now that I'm starting to feel better (a lot better!) I'm starting to get a little bit of cabin fever. I'm not use to being home all the time, with not much to do and no where to go. Also not to mention my energy level is still at a minimum, so though I may be feeling better, I still get tired pretty quick. I have applied to a few jobs as I feel I should be working a little bit ( just to save my sanity even) and help my husband out some, but as of yet no luck (not that I believe in luck). The past week I was really starting to get discouraged, I've been kind of feeling like this off and on the past couple months. Even though Adam and I are VERY excited about this little baby, it wasn't really our plan (though I do know it's Gods plan! =)). Now I'm trying to figure out where I fit into this plan, and if I'm suppose to be a photographer, how am I suppose to get my feet of the ground and started. If I want to get the equipment I need to get business started then I need a job, I can't get a job because no one seems to want to hire a pregnant lady. Also in the last month I turned down two weddings I could of done because they were around my due date. I was very discouraged because I felt like that was a way to get my foot in the door...to get experience and get my name out there.

This sad, pity-party thinking is coming to an end! Somedays it's hard, especially when to you have a lot of time on your hands to sit and dwell. God has a reason for this baby, and for it coming into our lives at this time, and instead of sitting around feeling sorry for myself I need to start doing something about it. First off, one good thing about a baby, is I will always have a cute adorable model available 24/7 for me. This way I can practice, and get promotional shots...and who doesn't want 25 million (exaggeration) photos of their baby =). We most likely won't need to take our baby to a professional photographer (Money saver!!) because I am one! Also, this baby provides me with a foot in the door! When you have a baby who else are you going to meet buut other mothers with babies!! Where as before I didn't know anyone, or hardly anyone. So those are all exciting things that can happen once the baby's born ( not to mention all the other exciting things that parents get to experience that we are thrilled about!) but what about now, here I have free time, and nothing to do. Well answer to prayers this week I did pick up some work with a photographer I was working with before Christmas. Not a lot but a little bit through the week. Plus I started thinking, and I really do need to get things organized, Finish old photos of mine that I haven't finished. And start thinking about the future, ways to improve my skills, help me stay creative and ways to inspire me. Start thinking about ways to get my business started. There are many things that I can be working on, and I don't need to sit around feeling sorry because I'm not going anywhere.

Now the key is to keep this ambition. I find myself many a times getting inspired and motivated one day and the next back to the same old routine. I really pray that I start to do something and go somewhere, I would really like this education to pay off one way or another. I have this urge and desire and passion to create, now I just need to go out and do it!

A Thankful Heart

"It is impossible for the seeds of depression to take root in a thankful heart."

This is a quote I saw in someones facebook status recently. She had mentioned that it was a quote from the book "Laughter is the spice of life". As soon as I read this quote it hit me right at heart. Lately I've been a little down with being so sick and everything. As much as I am excited about this little baby growing inside of me, it just seemed that there were a lot of inconveniences. Plus the whole fact that I spent my entire Christmas watching everyone else eat Christmas dinner, sweets and leftovers while I picked at my potatoes and occasionally took a mad dash to the washroom. In my sad sorry state I was feeling nothing but pity...for MYSELF. Now I look back a realize how inconsiderate I was being. Many people would give anything to have a baby and be where I am now. I decided to do a self examination and realized that I did not have a thankful heart. Then and there I decided from now on, no matter what the circumstances I will try my absolute hardest to be thankful.

Besides I have many things to be thankful for. Starting with the amazing husband God has given me. Even in the hard times he was there for me, cleaned up after me ;), stood strong in his faith and reminded me that this is Gods plan for our life. Secondly I am thankful for the amazing family I have, and the good grounds my parents have brought me up on. I've learned lots from them, and pray that I can be half as good parent as they have been. I am also thankful for God and his understand and his Grace and mercy for us. So many times I fail him, and yet the Bible promised me that he will never leave me. Lastly (but not finally, because I could go on forever on what I'm thankful for) this little miracle baby, though I didn't understand why at first and even if it seemed not the right time this baby has been and will be a blessing in our life. It's a gift from God and I should always be thankful for the little life he gave. I pray that I will be a good parent and live a life that is pleasing to God and that someday my children will grow up to serve God in anyway they can.

Today I am choosing to be thankful!

"Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and into courts with praise: be thankful unto him, and bless his name." Psalm 100:4

Snowy Covered Days

This is my first blog and I'm not quite sure what to say just yet. I've been debating for sometime whether or not I wanted to blog but I have had so many thoughts and just know way to share them lately. It took me some time to figure this blog thing all out, but I think I got it now ;).

It's a blizzard out today, church tonight has been canceled and my husband says the roads are terrible. On days like today I enjoy curling up with a good book and enjoying some hot chocolate =). The only problem today is with my morning sickness I haven't quite enjoyed hot chocolate these days, and most my days are spent reading. Oh well God has a plan for it all and just to think in 6 months I get to meet that bundle of joy. It's caused me great griefs the past couple months but I'm sure it will be worth it all in the end. For now I'll just listen to the recorded heartbeat I have and remind myself of God's promises.